dear ling,
it's the time of the year again..when you need to rush assignments and prepare for exams..why..you always wonder how come it seems you are always so "unlucky"..that you hv assignmts to rush still at this time and can't work on studying for exams instead..you take so long to write 1 essay..
formulating the essay topic, researching on the topic..picking out the relevant info, rephrasing it so you don commit plagiarism, making sure all ur writing links tgt in 1 coherent whole, checking for mistakes and grammatical errors, doing up the references, cutting words to keep within the word limit.....
it's so draining..so very draining..you are so scared of what is in store as above tt you dare not even start..dare not even make the first step to do enough research on the topic! how come? how come you are so timid? dear girl, if you cant and don even make tt step, you can nv finish ur essay and will nv be able to study for exams at all...
why, you ask urself..why is ur essay due on ur 1st day of exam?...
you are so scared of starting ur essay you keep eating, doing other stuff..dilly dallying..slping at odd hrs, slpin more than 11hrs a day when you already hv no time!! you think of food..eating..rewarding urself..shopping but not abt ur essay..WHEN WHEN ..dear ling..WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO START?
you rem last sem when you had to rush socio essays nearing exam time and you had such a big dilemma abt whether to run home to do it or not..stop running away..stop thinking of food and start working..but u noe u cant..u want to study..you are scared you wont do well..you want to do well..your head is bursting because u cant discipline urself..
you keep telling urself: "ok..jus 1 more bite of cake/bread and yup, i will DEFINITELY start working ya?"...but u noe u nv..u nv did..you are so disappointed in urself cos u can no longer discipline urself..you hv lost the willpower..ur internal ability to WAKE URSELF UP!
ling, no one can help you..will writing this letter to urself wake u up? or is this another "procrastination tactic" of urs..telling urself tt after writing it.. "I WILL START WORKING ON MY ESSAY?" haiz..
you cant run away from ur fear..fear of the draining process tt is to come..no matter how weak ur willpower is..you still hv to go on..you hv to be strong..tell urself u can conquer it and work on it..it's hard to forget abt exams when u are working on ur essay..but u must..please please please..please work hard on ur essay alright?
rgds,
ill-disciplined distressed brat!
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2 comments:
SL,
You're really making your life difficult...think of me and YT sometimes, we are slackers.
I know I can definately do better if I work harder, but my life will be really hard then...sometimes pls relax a bit, take a stroll outside your house when you're bored.
Pls, take care of yourself, you worry me.
sl, i know you know you cant run away this time. 'home' is so far away. tell yourself there's no way to run, and the only way is to face it.
dont stock up food in your room. buy when you need it. or if you really want to eat, eat some light stuffs (some healthy biscuits or fruits) while working on your essay.
you sleep too much probably because there's the only way which you can "run away" for a while. but that makes matter worse! (im doing that also, which is not good)
like yx suggested, appreaciate the beauty our environment when you're bored :)
take care, my friend. your exam is just exactly a week away. all the best and start working on your essay NOW!
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